A Post which will live in INFAMY (not the original title)

Oh, the humanity! Somewhere over my location in the upper atmosphere, molecules of hydrogen and oxygen are somehow being forced together in just the right combination to, my god, how do I say this......to form water! And it's not that wispy white stuff that floats around in the sky, no my friends, it's forming into actual DROPS and falling from the sky! It's everywhere! I can hear these horrible chemical bombs impacting my roof as I type. If you read this, tell the world! It could be spreading even now! The ground outside is actually saturated with the stuff! The weather people tried to warn us, but did we listen? Noooooooo! We in our arrogance dismissed the whole silly idea, "there's no such things as condensation..." Idiots! My porch is actually coated with water! Pray for me, my fellow humans; I will hang on here as long as I can...........

Now that I have gotten THE Michael's overly dramatic weather report out of the way, it's time to get to the meat of the matter. Did you know that on this day, December 8th..........

Having been shown in no uncertain terms the previous day that Imperial Japan actually DID possess weapons of mass destruction, President Franklin D. Roosevelt thought it would be a good idea to take the focus off our intelligence failures by declaring war on Japan.




The Chinese Nationalists, having lost too many ping pong games to the Communists, take their paddles and retire to the island of Taiwan.








President Richard Nixon finally admitted to having an exit strategy from Vietnam, which consisted of training the South Vietnamese to take responsibility for their own security. I think we all know how well THAT went......






Humorist James Thurber is born, author of "The Secret Life of Walter Mitty". He wrote some other things too, but who cares.




Jeanette Rankin, first woman to be elected to congress, casts the lone dissenting vote against the declaration of war against Japan. This was a repeat performance of her vote against war in WWI. Two years later, actually convinced that her vote had killed any chance of winning reelection, she retired from political office, returning to her home-state of Montana, where she took up the cause of the state's oppressed cattle population, to no avail.





Mark David Chapman murders John Lenon outside his apartment building in New York, proving once and for all that "The Catcher in the Rye" should be banned from all the nation's libraries. This also demonstrated what happens when you listen to Beatles tapes at the wrong speed.



On this day the Toyota Motor Company received permission from the Allied Occupation Government to start production of buses and trucks........a day that shall live in infamy.








And.......Soon to be dead President Abraham Lincoln issues his Proclamation of Amnesty and Reconstruction, failing to address the issue of who was going to do all the work for Southerners now that the black folks, now second class citizens, were all moving to Detroit to cut record deals as soon as the record was invented.






What, you guys didn't know all this? Well, that's why I, THE Michael, is here. Now you do.