Monday, September 25, 2006

Brevity, Sweet Brevity (The Extended Version)

A highly esteemed, talented, and very sick colleague of mine has written a post that has struck very long, sharp needles into the very fabric of the voodoo doll which is my blog, otherwise known to the world (since I became famous) as "Dances With Leaves", the title which is, ironically, based on an actual suggestion made by same colleague. In this post, and I am steeling myself to impart this blasphemy, he is suggesting that some of us need to pare back on our musings to such an extent that they become.....oh, how shall I put this...shorter. Another-words, my dear readers, he dares to suggest that we embrace....shudder..........BREVITY!

Gasp.....there....I said it, and may Bob almighty forgive me for the poison I dared allow to flow across my lips! Yes, my friends, he is tired of having to focus his attention on what one says to such an extent that he stick with it till the bitter end, enduring segways and digressions (where have I heard THAT word before?) and thought patterns that are not delivered with brutal efficiency, getting to the point before he falls asleep on his keyboard or simply hits the next bookmark on his list. AND, his finger is becoming rather buff having to roll the scroll wheel on his mouse in order to get to the end of our blogs. This is a travesty. We, my friends, are ruining the symmetry of our fair hero's mousing hand by forcing him to work that wheel to get thru our long, drawn out dissertations on the effects of man-in-the-moon marigolds on drought stricken soils in midwestern gardens. We should be so ashamed.

Actually, and I may find myself upon the same platform with a trap door beneath my feet, I think I can understand where he's coming from. There ARE some of us, and I won't name names, because frankly I tend to avoid them myself if they are extra special guilty of this tendency, who can write each and every post with such length and mini-series quality that it takes a good half hour to digest. And not all of these grand gatherings of words are greater than the sum of their fonts. However, I would like to suggest that if you have the thirst for ideas necessary to endure these marathons of musings, the time you invest soaking up their offerings are more often than not worth the effort. Not all, of course, but I would like to think most. Most, that is, as in the ones that intrigues us enough to record that bookmark in the first place.

His desire that we keep our contributions to less than two "page scrolls" in order not to violate his attention span, however, is a desire that I personally have no desire on my part to cater to, as I may have reasons valid perhaps only to me for violating his quota of thought process and/or how that thought process is delivered for consumption. I'm sure that many times I have bored people either with subject manner or the convoluted manner in which I wove such tapestry, but that is the risk any author takes when he creates anything literary. It's a calculated risk every one of us takes when we open up the faucets of our Id and fill the pools for our public to either refresh themselves in or drown in.

This is not an attack on his peeve. It's a common and understandable peeve and we all in one form or another are guilty of it, albeit probably never for ourselves, as that might cramp our style. This is a friendly rebuttal, from one person who has some sense of the other, and hopefully it will be taken as such. I even hope he gritted his teeth and made himself use the scroll wheel to reach this final ending to a long and drawn out response to said peeve. That would be a sign of respect, and if he thinks not, then I would have no reason to give a damn one way or another. But, having the sense of him that I do, I give him that benefit of the doubt. I hope you do too, no matter how insufferably long and drawn out your own posts might happen to usually be.

Matter of fact, I have made MY point alot quicker than I intended, but fear not, for THE Michael has things to say which I am sure will fill many a post to come with no taint of BREVITY to weigh them down. Stay tuned.

11 comments:

Tim ID said...

Interesting, michael, that you would assume I was referring to you. But I get your message: you don't agree with me that brevity is next to godliness. Wait...I think I made your point in eleven words. :)

Buffalo said...

One could learn to read a little more quickly, but I digress.

Homo Escapeons said...

Brevity

SCHMEVITY!

I_Wonder said...

I'm glad to see you're feeling good and having fun with your blog!

anna said...

This is quite possibly one of the shortest posts you've ever written, but I'm not complaining. Babble away, The Michael - I'll continue to read faithfully.

darlingina said...

Screwem if they don't have the ability to finish till the end. Their loss. And it's Your blog to do with as You please. And a damn fine one too i might add. :)
~gina~

The Michael said...

Tim, my friend, no, actually I know well some of these epic blogs you spoke of, and although mine can violate your two page scroll law on a regular basis, I knew you weren't outting me specifically.

But I digress........

Sometimes.....well, probably most times, what I have to offer is sometimes not so much what I have to say rather than how I say it. So, don't count on me writing posts that essentially go like, "We're all gonna die. I hate Paris. Bush pisses me off. Tim is funny. Nuff said."

Buf.......grin.

gina.....yea, screwem! lol! :)

I_Wonder said...

Hey, what happened to my comment from yesterday? Here is is again: "Glad to see you are feeling well and having fun with your blog"

gautami tripathy said...

Direct your friend to my blog rooted.
I write the biggest of thoughts in shortest of words!

He will love it!

:D

The Michael said...

I'm sorry Paul, but you were preselected for an extended security evaluation based on your propensity to agree with me, which, under the Patriot Act, has been flagged as a possible act of sedition against the King. Look out your window, and if there are any black SUV's parked out there, I'd head out the back door and head for Canada. You might could stay with Buffalo, if you can find yourself a coyote to sneak you over the border. :)

Anybody else send in comments that didn't get posted? Let me know.

Quatami, thanks for stopping by and offering our long suffering friend an abbreviated alternative.

anna said...

Hmm, this is the second time one of my posts has not appeared. I wonder what blogger is doing with them.

Anyhow, I had only commented that this is quite possibly one of the shortest posts you've written.