The Florida Christian Coalition, being the fine upstanding God-fearing Americans that they are, have decided we need protection from those evil homo sex u wals that dare want to share their love within the bonds of matrimony. They are busy gathering signatures to put on the ballot an amendment to the State constitution to define marriage as strictly between a man and a woman. Bob knows there are plenty enough homophobes in this state to accomplish such an initiative. To bad we don't have an equal number of warophobes, povertyphobes, or homelessphobes.
Now, me, personally, you will never find stirring a drink with an umbrella in a gay bar. The flaming ones, the ones who put on such a grand show it's embarrassing to witness, piss me off, if only for the effect they have on their own cause. And please, make one pass at me and I will let you off with a friendly warning....twice....well.
Other than that, no problem. Love who you want. I think it's wonderful. I'm all for a person walking the path that Bob laid down for them. No sane person in their right mind would expose themselves to such abuse, so no, don't EVEN suggest to me that it's a choice. Not unless you want that "You are really a clueless, stupid, and mean human being" look I am rather good at giving someone.
Those good Christians, the ones who have not been rushing to the orphanages and state homes to adopt all these foster kids, also would not want our poor parent-less kids to suffer the terrible consequences of being adopted by two loving, caring people of the same sex. In retrospect, I would have been thrilled to have been adopted by two sasquaches who actually wanted to provide me a stable home, a good upbringing, and yes, gasp, love. However, it was deemed necessary to keep my moving around from home to good christian home rather than expose me to the ills of homosexuality, which certainly would have infected me with the gay virus.
So, when they bring you the petition and ask you to sign it, go right on ahead, because Bob knows we all need to be protected from the hordes of married gays that will be stalking our Walmarts and Publix's, infecting us all with the vibes such couples would be sending out all around them. God forbid!
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5 comments:
Damn Michael, I don't think I've heard it put any better. I'm on the same page.
Perfect title as well.
I plan on posting a story soon about something similiar. I was at one point, drowning in a sea of Christian hypocrisy. Learned quickly what was going on behind the scenes... and believe you me... they were involved in just as much sexual deviation as they pointed their crooked little Christian fingers at.
People are going to do what their nature dictates... some are just more honest about their orientation and are a bit less judgemental.
Michael, I must confess. I've been wanting to pat you on that cute ass since first I laid eyes on you.
Wait a minute, that wasn't you. I haven't seen you yet. Never mind.
This is well done, my friend. And a topic near and dear to my heart. The world needs a few more men like you. You know, real men that are secure in their own sexual identity and have some real christian love in their heart rather than the fake bullshit being pandered.
Live long and prosper
awwww....you guys...pashaw......grin.
I am also tired of the homophobic dumbasses that worry more about what people are doing than what they themselves should be doing.
People need to get over it...mind their own business...
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